We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Happy Seasons

by Patrick Canning

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $5 CAD  or more

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Hand crafted 6 panel gate-folded full colour CD package, made by the artist. He is all points in the production process, get this sexy ass CD in your CD shelves before the hip kids start embracing CDs as physical media again and ruin everything.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Happy Seasons via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 7 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      $12.99 CAD or more 

     

  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 26 Patrick Canning releases available on Bandcamp and save 70%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Real Person Magazine, Rictal Palm Mock, Rust Protection Maintenance, Happy Seasons, Rose Panic Mother, A Year Of February, Repurposed Provincial Monument, Rendered Pelican Mascara, and 18 more. , and , .

    Purchasable with gift card

      $32.70 CAD or more (70% OFF)

     

1.
F And the child is born C He won’t save the world G He won’t stop the wars Am_________________D/E/F/E/F/G There won’t be miracles And the child is born There’ll still be loneliness There’ll still be hopelessness There’ll still be hunger F And the child is born C Not in the wilderness G Not in the rain and snow Am Not in the desert G But he is beautiful F And he is my own blood C And that’s enough F Am E G Dm C G G/E G7 F C G Am And the child is born Angels won't sing on high Devils sleep down below Sheppards stare at their phones And the child is born And he will scream and cry He’ll have no appetite He won’t sleep through the night G But he is beautiful Dm______C And that’s enough
2.
G_________________________C_____G The wardens sang the 12 days of Christmas ______Bm_______E7____A for the boys on the factory floor _________D_________G___________Bm___F# Where the prisoners all slaved to make quota today ______F_____________G_________Am_ And truncheons rang the bars on the door _______F__________G__________C And the children who played in their cages ______Bm_____________F#________G Got a chocolate bar and a fresh cup of pills _____G7__________________C This’ll be the best Christmas in ages _____Bm_________F#7______G___F#7 Don’t tell us if you’re going to be ill Bm E7 A Am Am F Am Dm G# Am F E Am Dm G# Gm G C G C Cmin The boys in the border militia Trade gifts by the old concrete wall And guzzle their brews where that twit on the news Found the place where we buried them all And the prison guards polished their rifles And tape garland to the armory shelves While the children still sleep on the tiles And no one can speak for themselves
3.
_____________A#________Dm___D# How many more christmases ____Fm_________D#____D#Mb5__C#__F#__Adim Will I hold you in my arms? How many more holidays Will you fall for all my charms? Gm Somewhere down the road _______F Will we get what we are owed? _______D#min_____Gm6 Are we destined to explode _______Fm___________Gaug_G Before we all must go out dancing? How far have we gone? What’s the road that we’ve been on? Will be burn the amazon Before we all can go out dancing? How many more nights away Will you tell me I’m your man? How many more love affairs Til we’re back where we began? Somewhere near the end Is it too hard to pretend That we have enough to spend So we all can go out dancing It’s closer than you think Have you had enough to drink? Do we sign with blood or ink? So we all must go out dancing _____________C#________Fm___F# How many more harmonies ____G#m_________F#____F#Mb5__E__A__Cdim Will we sing before the dawn? How many more sleepless nights Will we have to carry on? (Instrumental) How many more witnesses Do we throw onto the fire? How many more christmases Will we hear the children’s choir? (Instrumental)
4.
Am E/Am Am E/Am Am E/Am Am E/Am Am_____C/Am___F/Am____D#/Am Spin me round the christmas tree Am______B/Am_____Am______G/C My eyes are closed it’s much too bright to see Am__E/Am__Am__G/C__Am_E/Am_Am_G/Am Although my feet can’t touch the ground Please tell my doctor I am homeward bound Dm____Dm7__Dm6__B/C/D__Fmaj____Emaj____Am Whisper in my ear all of the things you want this year ____Dm_____Dm7__Dm6_______B/C/D___Fmaj__Emaj And won’t you be surprised when all of your dreams are realized B7_Emaj_B7_Emaj surprise Am_E/Am_Am_G/C_Am_E/Am_Am_G/Am_Am ___Am___C/Am___F/Am__D#/Am And tell me captain your command ____Am______B/Am_____Am____G/C____Am___F__E The smoke has gone we’ve lost our place to stand Oh no G/C__Am___F/E__G/C__Am Our place to stand Oh no Oh no And tell the troops they’re going home The desert sands have turned to ice and snow Oh no ice and snow oh no ice and snow Children don’t you cry dry all the tears that fill your eyes It’s christmas all the time In heaven your daddies sing sublimely
5.
E________________________B7sus4 I wonder if there's a place I can go ___________________A where the winters won’t last forever ______________Am7 and they've never heard of snow E_________________________B7sus4 And if you ever find your way there _________________________A Maybe you can find a place to dump my ___________Am7 ashes everywhere D7_______________________Fm All the ghosts keep on bummin’ around _________________Cm Thinking they can all dance forever ______C7 In this northern shithole town I’d love to have a place by your side But the universe is made to keep us Here unsatisfied It’s so lonely here in this ice Even though it’s christmas time and The stars are shining bright All the wolves keep on bummin’ around Thinking they can just cry forever From their hole deep in the ground And all the ghosts keep a singin’ along Thinking they can just scream forever Like they know the words to the song All the devils keep on creepin’ about No one wants to get sentimental When they’re just popping pills into your mouth All the ghosts keep on bummin’ around Thinking they can just dance forever And no one hears a sound I’d love to find a place we can hide Where’s there’s nothing but sandy beaches And a warm sun on the tide But all these ghosts keep on buggin’ around wishin’ they were all going somewhere When they’re all tied to the ground And all these ghosts keep on flailing about Thinking they can all dance forever With no one calling them out
6.
A_____________________E__________________B Saving up all year to take a holiday away from here today _______________D#m__________A is there any place at all far enough away We found a hole that’s deep and wide enough to fit us all in here Is there anyone outside who can cover us with clay I need to find ten million bandages to wrap around my eyes If there’s any light at all there’ll be nowhere left to pray We plug our ears with dirt until the screaming doesn’t hurt our minds I will sing the Auld Lang Syne until the screaming goes away A B/F# D#m B/F# A B/F# D#m B/F# A_______________________E_______________________B We speak our words in coded messages we tap onto our palms __________________D#m__________________A If you have a voice at all you have nothing good to say Our masks were held so tight our faces hurt but it’s still hard to breathe with the ash still in the sky they can’t watch us fade away We try in vain to hide our waste inside these old abandoned mines Without any kind of love we’ll forget it’s christmas day dreaming all the year of some kind of holiday away from here today is there any place at all far enough away
7.
G at Christmas time Ddim6 I drank a glass of wine D5 13 and looked into the eyes D_________D7 of a stranger And though the song had only just begun I knew when it was done I was in danger C_______________Caug Dancing away the gloom ____________F6 in the empty room ____________D__D7 that you crept into within your arms I felt relief the knife between your teeth sparkled like the stars Sax solo Dancing like there’s nothing wrong your hands were very strong beneath the christmas lights Dancing without regrets you were cold and wet a kiss I can’t forget sax solo
8.
Hawaiian Christmas You stare at palm trees wrapped in Christmas lights The fake snow on the lava rocks clogs your wheelchair wheels And the ocean breeze is blowin' hard tonight A Hawaiian Christmas D____________________________ A You never seem to recognize my face D_____________________________A__________D7 The neighbors say Aloha Merry Christmas Marlene A_______________________E__________A And you act as if a stranger's in their place D_A_D_A_E Big Island Christmas You think the Hilton's waitress is your mom You need a helping hand to hold the spoon up to your mouth But you remember every word to every song Hawaiian Christmas You do not realize you're in a boat The ocean longs to take both family or a stranger And I'm sad to say you qualify as both D The waves come up A And the sun goes down D You won't recall A This crying sound E_____________________________A____E The ocean seems to recognize your name tonight The ocean longs to hold you in it’s arms The ocean calls to greet you with hello Merry Christmas Marlene
9.
D______________G My children scare me D___E__F#_G____F#__D__E__F#_E_____D____G__D they will run around and cry and throw things at me D___E__F#_____G____F#___D__E they will scream and scream and scream F#__E_____D______Bm and scream and scream they will eat the tinsel off of the tree they will puke all night and day and day and night they will never go to sleep without a fight they will throw the christmas wreaths into the fire they will curse and swear and slash their grandmas tires they will roam around the streets in vicious gangs they will cut you with their claws and sharpened fangs A But late this christmas night D there was a clatter on the roof A like the scrape of Santa’s sleigh D and clack of reindeer hooves G but what followed all that noise D was not the sound of christmas cheer G but a series of violent thuds E___________________A_A7 and a scream of primal fear G I ran outside to see about D this commotion on my home G and I saw my children bathed in blood E__________________A with a stack of reindeer bones G reindeer bones D___GDGDGDGD A A7 D
10.
F_____________________C Little Bruno Muller Schmid burned his sisters hair and also stole his brother’s toys and broke the baby’s chair because he did not beware Bb________Bbm________F______Fm_C_Cm of who was coming up the stairs... Little Ingrid Eder Haas drowned her father’s goat and carved a Nazi swastika into her uncles boat but she had no time to gloat Bb_________Bbm_______F______FM_C_Cm_E_C_Cm_E because sailing across the moat.. C____________________G Black Peter and his friend Saint Nick C_____________F came sailing into town C_______________G__________Am_____F and quickly rounded up the horrid children C_________________G they stuffed them into boxes filled with C_______________F Scorpions and snakes C_______________G______________Am_____________F they guzzled eggnog while the muffled screaming filled the air They broke in through their windows They grabbed them from their beds They tied them up with ropes and chains and gagged their sinful heads They took all of their toys and games and threw them in the fire the fire made from gasoline and little thieves and liars The people of the town all cheered while smoke filled up the sky they’d got their presents earlier, the smoke had made them high then on the backs of ravens wings they flew into the air good ol’ pete and nicholas can end up anywhere
11.
I’ve packed my bags and I’m leaving you tonight Merry Christmas I’ve grabbed the nearest train out of town Merry Christmas I’m never going to call you You won’t know where I am I’m taking both the kids and the car Merry Christmas I’ve cleaned out all the money in the bank Merry Christmas I’ve maxed out all your credit cards Merry Christmas I called up all your family And told them you’re on drugs I told them you beat the kids twice a day I’ve hacked into your facebook I posted the pictures from Amsterdam I got you fired from your daycare center job I’ve pawned off all your jewelry I’ve scratched all your cd’s Flushed all your prescriptions down the drain I put poison in your fish tank Spread some rumors you had STDs Kicked your dog and set your house ablaze Merry Christmas
12.
On Christmas day my wife gave birth to snakes On Christmas day she gave birth to serpents The crows fell from the sky and all the children lost an eye on Christmas day the world was ending The angels in heaven burned themselves alive on Christmas day on Christmas day they slit their throats open The air grew thick with arterial spray on Christmas day and I was blinded by lust And then the bells chime out Hallelujah And then the choirs sing Go fuck yourselves The sound of footsteps on the roof told me the truth at last the time had come for Santa's blood The gleaming in his eye and in his mouth a festering mountain of sores vile discoloured and awful And Santa's penis his red curly penis sparkled like comets exploding in fire destroying villages and towns And as he reached deep in his sac the room was filled with unspeakably horrible sounds of screaming on Christmas day
13.
I sat watching all the children cry This disappointing christmas Your face it bloomed with mustard coloured sores This wretched christmas Everyone cries at christmas Chasing children through the filthy bushes Their shoes lost in the snow banks I threw their suppers to the hunting dogs To teach the how to give thanks Everyone cries at christmas Everyone cries at christmas (where's my money?) Throwing bleach into the pony's eyes I thought I taught you better All you're getting from Santa Claus Is some blood stains on your sweater Because everyone dies at christmas Everyone dies at christmas

about

The tradition of the Christmas song in our culture is as long and thorny as the sordid legacy of our hegemonic colonial Christian society itself. The Christmas songs you hear on the radio are usually all recorded cheap and dirty at some point in the previous summer by sad, sweaty, desperate music producers looking for a quick money cash in. Potentially an incredibly lucrative cash in if your song happens to find traction with the public and gets added to the lexicon of “Christmas standards”. I don't mind the whole quick, cheap and dirty part of the equation, I just always felt it should be done as close as possible to the day itself so you get more of that ineffably desperate Christmas energy in there, make it a little more spicy!

From the years 2008 to 2021 I would write and record a new Christmas song in the last couple weeks before Christmas, each with their own accompanying music video that was also done within a week or so before the 25th of December. Oftentimes this harsh deadline created some real inspiration, although it's almost always more than a little janky (especially the video part). It's my little Christmas tradition that mostly just annoyed my wife as it kept me very busy on the first few days of her holiday vacation, I figured 13 is a nice lucky number for a completed Christmas album and this year marked the arrival of my first-born son Malcolm, so I figured writing and recording a song over Christmas vacation will get exponentially harder from here on out probably, so it’s a good point to call it done.

The project started as a very cheeky excuse for me to write some transgressive nonsense with some Santa references or whatnot thrown in, not exactly the most ground-breaking material I’ve ever written. But as the years went on I began to really look forward to writing the next song as I realized that it’s a good way to cheat the system in my ultimate goal of writing the saddest song ever written. If you come up with a decent sorrowful story idea or a tragic hook for a song, all you need to do is change the setting of it to Christmas time and you’ve added a whole new layer of depth to it since now the tragedy occurred at Christmas of all times! It became an excuse to indulge in a bit of sentimental reflection which is something I try very hard to avoid in all my other creative output. Although this year’s song “A Child Is Born” is the only song that can honestly be taken as fully sentimental out of the whole set.

As the collection grew the thing that I was most surprised with was how well the songs hung together as a group when I would listen to them in sequence. Considering how they span 14 years of practice and were recorded in many different locations (every house me and my wife ever lived in) and under very different circumstances. There is still a nice natural flow to the songs. In my opinion at least.

While nostalgia is a sentiment I always treat with the greatest suspicion, listening back to this collection it is unquestionably the sentiment that fills me the most, each song is connected to many dear memories with family and friends. If you, dear listener, can feel even a small slice of that sentiment while hearing to this set of dark and sorrowful tunes I would feel I have accomplished my goal and am deeply thankful for it.
Merry Christmas!

credits

released December 22, 2021

Patrick Canning - Voice, words, Music, Guitar, Bass, Drums, Glockenspiel, other...
Alison Corbett - Violin (2009, 2021)
Justin Mahoney - Bass & Mandolin (2011)
Bill Mahoney - Electric Guitar (2011)
Victor Lewis - Trombone (2009), Guitar (2018)
Michelle Swab - Accordion & Vocals (2011), Piano & Vocals (2014), Vocals (2018,2019,2020)
Chris McGee - Saxophone (2015)
Jake Nicoll - Drums (2016)
Alex Bridger - Guitar Melotron (2016)

license

tags

about

Patrick Canning St. John'S, Newfoundland and Labrador

Patrick is an artist type who lives out on the edge of nowhere in St. John's Newfoundland and makes music for himself.

contact / help

Contact Patrick Canning

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Patrick Canning recommends:

If you like Patrick Canning, you may also like: